What to Do After Someone Dies: A Timeline for the First Month

The days and weeks following a loved one's death can feel like navigating uncharted territory while in a fog. There are numerous tasks to manage—some urgent, others that can wait—all while processing your own grief. As someone who has guided many families through this journey, I've created this timeline to help you prioritize what needs attention when.

Remember that this timeline is a guide, not a rigid schedule. Some tasks may not apply to your situation, while others might take more or less time depending on your circumstances. Be gentle with yourself through this process.

Immediate Steps: The First Week

These first hours require attending to the most essential matters while taking care of your immediate emotional needs.

If Death Occurs at Home

• If expected (such as with hospice): Call the hospice nurse who will guide you through next steps

• If unexpected: Call 911 (be aware this may involve police investigation as standard procedure)

• Do not call a funeral home until the death has been legally pronounced

If Death Occurs in a Hospital or Care Facility

• The facility will guide you through their procedures

• You'll typically need to provide the name of your chosen funeral home

For All Situations

• Contact immediate family members and close friends
  Consider designating someone to help spread the word to reduce your burden

• Begin funeral home arrangements (if you’re having a funeral)
  Choose a funeral home if you haven't already and schedule an appointment

• Arrange care for dependents and pets
  Ensure children, elderly dependents, or pets have proper care

• Secure the deceased's home if unoccupied
  Check that doors and windows are locked, mail is collected, and valuables are secure. Don’t forget to clear out the fridge!

• Begin gathering important documents
  Look for the will, funeral instructions, and financial information

• Take care of yourself
  Remember to eat, hydrate, and rest when possible

Initial Arrangements and Notifications

During this period, focus on funeral or memorial planning and beginning the official notification process.

Memorial and Funeral Arrangements

• Finalize details with the funeral home

• Write an obituary (the funeral home often assists with this)

• Plan the service, including speakers, readings, music, and photos

• Consider establishing a memorial fund if desired

Important Notifications

• Order 5-10 death certificates through the funeral home
  (You'll need these for financial and legal matters)

• Notify the deceased's employer
  Ask about final paychecks, benefits, and life insurance

• Begin notifying government agencies:

  • Social Security Administration (800-772-1213) - the funeral home should take care of this but make sure to double check to make sure they were notified.

  • Veterans Affairs if applicable (800-827-1000)

• Contact the deceased's attorney
  Schedule a time to review the will and discuss next steps. If they didn’t have one, ask for recommendations from those in your network.

Practical Matters

• Begin tracking expenses related to the death
  Many are tax-deductible or reimbursable from the estate

• Start a list of people to thank
  Note those who bring food, send flowers, or offer meaningful support

Weeks 2-4: Financial and Legal First Steps

By the second week, begin addressing financial matters and continue the notification process.

Financial Steps

• Locate and review financial accounts:

  • Bank accounts

  • Investment accounts

  • Retirement accounts

  • Credit cards and loans

• Contact the deceased's bank
  Inquire about account access procedures (these vary by institution)

• Notify credit card companies
  Request account closures and final statements

• Begin inventory of assets
  Create a spreadsheet or document listing all known assets

Insurance Matters

• Contact life insurance companies
  Initiate claims process for any policies

• Notify health insurance providers
  Cancel coverage and request any premium refunds

• Contact other insurance providers (auto, homeowners, etc.)
  Update or cancel policies as appropriate

Additional Notifications

• Notify utility companies and landlord if applicable

• Contact the post office to forward or hold mail

• Begin notifying subscription services and membership organizations

Beyond the First Month: Estate Administration and Self-Care

The remainder of the first and second months involve deeper estate matters and establishing support for yourself.

Legal and Estate Matters

• Meet with the attorney to begin formal estate administration

• If named as executor, understand your responsibilities and timeline

• File for probate if necessary (with attorney guidance)

• Begin cataloging and securing valuable property

• Update property titles for jointly-owned assets

Financial Continuation

• Contact the deceased's financial advisor if applicable

• Notify mortgage company or landlord

• Check for recurring automatic payments that need cancellation

• Begin organizing tax information (the final tax return will be due)

Digital Afterlife

• Begin identifying digital accounts that need attention

• Look for password lists or digital asset instructions

• Consider memorialization options for social media accounts

Self-Care and Support

• Connect with grief support resources

  • Bereavement groups

  • Grief counseling

  • Online support communities

• Establish routines that support your physical and emotional health

• Accept help from those offering practical support

• Be patient with yourself as you navigate both tasks and emotions

While this timeline focuses on the first month, estate settlement typically takes 6-18 months. Keep these longer-term considerations in mind:

• Tax returns for the deceased and potentially the estate will need filing

• Asset distribution according to the will or state law will proceed

• Some accounts and subscriptions may need additional follow-up

• Grief continues to evolve and need attention throughout the first year and beyond

When to Seek Professional Help

Consider engaging professional support for:

• Complex estates with multiple assets or beneficiaries

• Situations involving business ownership

• High-conflict family dynamics

• Overwhelming paperwork or decision fatigue

• Grief that significantly impairs daily functioning

Professional support might include:

• Estate attorneys

• Accountants

• Professional organizers

• End-of-life doulas

• Grief counselors

• Executor Logistical Support

Closing Thoughts

Remember that while these tasks need attention, they don't all need immediate completion. Prioritize your well-being throughout this process and accept help when offered.

The administrative tasks following a death can feel overwhelming, but they also provide a constructive channel for grief energy. Many people report that having concrete tasks gave them a sense of purpose during an otherwise disorienting time.

Be compassionate with yourself through this journey. There is no "right way" to navigate grief and practicalities simultaneously.

Need personalized guidance through the post-death process? As someone who specializes in after-death support, I offer services to help executors and families navigate both practical tasks and emotional challenges during this difficult time. Contact me to learn how I can help lighten your load.